The Struggle with Inauthenticity: Why Some People Feel Fake When Speaking


Let’s explore the reasons behind the struggle with inauthenticity and why so many people feel disconnected from their true selves during conversations.

Have you ever experienced a moment when you feel like you’re not being true to yourself while speaking? 🤔 You’re not alone. Many individuals wrestle with feelings of inauthenticity when communicating, whether it’s in casual conversations, professional settings, or public speaking engagements.

In this blog, we’ll dive into why some people feel fake when speaking and explore research and statistics related to this phenomenon.

📊 Statistics on inauthentic Communication

Impostor Syndrome:

🕵️ A study published in the International Journal of Behavioral Science estimated that approximately 70% of individuals have experienced Impostor Syndrome at some point in their lives. This psychological pattern causes people to doubt their accomplishments, fear being exposed as a fraud, and can lead them to feel inauthentic in their communication.

Fear of Judgment:

🪞 According to a 2017 survey conducted by Chapman University, about 74.5% of Americans fear being negatively judged by others, leading them to engage in inauthentic communication to avoid rejection or criticism.

🔍  Research on the Psychology of Inauthenticity

Social Identity Theory:

🌐 This theory, introduced by Henri Tajfel and John Turner in the 1970s, suggests that individuals classify themselves and others into social groups. In some instances, individuals may feel pressure to conform to the norms and expectations of a particular group, leading them to communicate in a way that feels inauthentic.

Self-Monitoring Theory:

👀 According to psychologist Mark Snyder, self-monitoring is the extent to which individuals regulate their behavior based on social cues. High self-monitors are more likely to adjust their communication style to fit the situation, even if it doesn’t align with their true feelings. This can result in feelings of inauthenticity.

Self-Perception Theory:

💡 Developed by Daryl Bem, this theory posits that individuals infer their own attitudes and emotions by observing their own behavior. When people engage in inauthentic communication, they may feel fake because their behavior doesn’t align with their self-perceived values or beliefs.

🚀  Embrace the feeling of Inauthenticity

Embrace Vulnerability:

🤗 Brene Brown, a renowned researcher on vulnerability, encourages individuals to embrace their authentic selves, even if it means risking rejection or judgment. Practicing vulnerability can help individuals feel more genuine in their communication.

Develop Self-Awareness:

🧠 Gaining a deeper understanding of your values, beliefs, and emotions can help you recognize when you’re not being true to yourself. Cultivating self-awareness can enable you to communicate more authentically.

Seek Feedback:

🗣️ Constructive feedback from friends, colleagues, or mentors can provide valuable insights into your communication style and help you identify areas where you might be coming across as inauthentic.


Feeling fake when speaking is a challenge that many individuals face, but understanding the psychology behind these feelings and employing strategies to overcome them can help foster more authentic communication.

By embracing vulnerability, developing self-awareness, and seeking feedback, you can work toward a more genuine and effective communication style that truly reflects who you are. 🌟

Check out my Youtube video on this topic:

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